Don't send me email with the wrong address - part III

As you know- I continue to get email to my account that is meant for someone else. After gently dissuading them I was the wrong recipient, they persisted. At their own peril it turns out...

Hello, Everyone!

We have a date for our new Supper Shuffle group’s first gathering. It is Sunday, November 11^th. Let’s plan to meet at our home at 5 pm. We live at 516 XXXXX Ave. in River xxxxx (four houses north of Lake Street, on the west side; last of the four red brick and stucco houses). You can park on the west side of our street in front of our house, in our driveway, or across the street in the Methodist Church parking lot. Our phone number is xxx-xxxx

Al plans to do pork roast on the grill. John and Loretta – please bring the appetizers. Darrell and Rosemary – please bring a vegetable. And Mary – please bring a dessert. If Linda does come with you, Mary, would you have her bring some applesauce? Please let me know if she is not coming.

As a reminder, Rosemary does not tolerate milk products. And, UNFORTUNATELY, I cannot eat onions (including chives, leeks, scallions, shallots) or bell peppers. If you have a recipe which includes any of those delicious items, you could do what my family does for me. Make the recipe without those foods, remove a small portion for me, then add the onion, etc. for everyone else.

Have I forgotten anything? Let me know if I did. See you soon!

Irmgard

So I respond thusly - there is no dissuading these people:

This sounds awesome! 
Couple of quick questions for the group - does everybody like turnips? Rosemary does some nice 'nips, and as a practicing lacto vegan gluten free ovo-tarian, she has a way to make then not taste like casket wood.
Also, I'm not sure we should park in the Methodist church lot. Those guys are hard core about their Sunday services, and I certainly don't want to pull up in the middle of any ritualistic goat sacrifice. And those robes....gives me the willies just thinking about it! Anyhoo, looking forward to seeing you all. I have a bunch of internet cat videos I want to share!
Ps - plan to get lubed up, I'm bringing a bucket of Jäger for us all!

Finally, A President I can trust!

So lets review. Obama and his State Department apologize to Muslims after the terrorist attack at the embassy in Egypt and attack on U.S. Consulate building in Libya. Then on the day of the terrorist attacks, Obama pops off the Las Vegas to fund-raise with a bunch of leftist fat cats, and take some turns shooting dice at the craps tables. While his Ambassador was missing, and by all accounts, being anally raped and tortured. All while the President of Libya says it wasn't the video - and there wasn't even protests before the Benghazi consulate was attacked. Sorry Jay Carney. 





For the last week, the Obama regime continued to deny that the attacks on Americans in Muslim countries were terrorism, and now we pay $70,000 to apologize to Pakistanis on their TV for the Youtube video.



You heard that right - we are paying to run an ad in Pakistan apologizing for the video that Obama said we have nothng to do with.

The ad features Obama talking about ‘religious tolerance’ and Hillary Clinton again begging and pleading with Muslims that the U.S. government had nothing to do with the Youtube video. All in an effort to not "rile up" the Muslims, who by all accounts are usually a calm, measured and insightful people.


Not to distract from the issue at hand - that in the most dangerous country in the world, on the anniversary of the 9/11 attacks, our Ambassador had no protection, and two ex Navy Seals, stationed there to protect the data and records threw themselves into the breach to protect the Ambassador. All while Valerie Jarrett vacations in Martha's Vineyard, a notorious hotbed of unrest and violence with EIGHT (8!) armed Secret Service agents and armored vehicles.


Obama has it right - the real issue is the video, and not the Obama administration's policies of appeasement in the middle east. Sure.


Finally it would appear that we have a President we can trust - unfortunately, he is the President of Libya.

The 5 signs of an Impending Business Apocalypse

KC has spent much of his adult life in business. At large firms, some with 10's of thousands of employees. He has been a consultant, an entrepreneur (Yes, I did build it, and you can't have any of it for your low life friends Mr. President) and a paid slave. Big firms, small firms, national, local and international - KC has seen it all. And he took notes.

So for all of you out there that are just starting in business, let KC give you some pithy obeservations so you too can recognize when your employer is starting the big swirling circle around the porcelain bowl of business.

I present to you - the 5 signs of Impending Business Apocalypse - in their order of occurrence.

1. Everything is the single most important thing we can do.

You know a company has started the journey to Flushville when the management cannot articulate what are the goals of the company. More frighteningly - because they can't articulate the goals, they say EVERYTHING is the goal. Raise revenue, cut costs, expand, contract, focus, broaden, more customers, fire customers, stop projects, start projects. Everything is the single most important thing we can do - and we have to do it all NOW.

2. Enforce the Rules

Now, as I said, these occur in order. Once management sees the non-results of their ill-sown strategy of "Pursue Everything and Nothing At the Same Time" they then reach the conclusion that it isn't leadership, and it isn't the strategy that is failing the company, it is the people. And people are bad. So in order to get the people in line, we're going to enforce the rules. 15 minutes extra for lunch? That's gonna cost ya. Paid vacations? How bout not. Remove benefits, slash compensation, change the rules. KC once had a boss tell him that commissions "irrespective of performance, were discretionary". Huh? You paying me what you bargained for is "discretionary"? The worst part of this impending sign is that the employees haven't done anything wrong. Yet. But enforcing the rules at this time ensures the good ones leave, and the bad ones stay. And oh, do they stay with a vengeance. Which leads us to tenet #3.

3. Employees Get Payback

Without trust, management is worthless. Think of the fragging incidents in Vietman. Ok, Lieutenant Dan, you want to be a wise guy eh? How bout we roll an M67 under your bunk. Problem solved (actually I think they used MKIIs in Nam - but point made) . Now, employees today don't come heavily armed (well, except for the post office) but they can do just as much damage. Extra long lunch hours, moonlighting, half cooked project delivery, re-work, no-work. Best story I ever heard regarding an employee fragging incident came from a friend of mine that was a comptroller at a large convenience store chain. Every Christmas, the chain leaned on it's suppliers and offered their long term, full timers a bottle of liquor for Christmas. One bean counter decided that the 20,000 bottle bonus (most of which was comped by a supplier anyways) cost the company too much, so three weeks before xmas they cancelled it. You guessed it. Total incremental bottle pilferage over the season amount to 50,000 bottles. Hold spoon, pull pin, assess cover, lob weapon. Sorry, Lt. Dan.

4. Cats Sleeping with Dogs

Again - these are situations and generalitites KC has seen over many years of business, but he holds these truths to be self evident. Once the E-ticket swirly ride has begun, people do some strange things. Trapped on a ride they can't get off of, they hold on for dear life - and hold on to each other. And I mean literally. Affairs, trysts, indiscretions and misogyny abound, and not the normal 20 something activity on the weekeds from the mail room staff - I mean full on, scratch your head what were they thinking escapades. CEO doing the Fed Ex delivery guy? Seen it. Head of HR in a lesbian affair with the married head of IT? Yup. Call center supervisors having late night orgies in a break room. Got pictures. The shocking thing about #4 is not that it is happening, because we're all humans, but the depravity of how it happens. The end is near. Read on.

5. Physical or Verbal Violence in the Workplace

By now, all the good people are gone. If you are still there, you aren't one of the good ones - or you are the most masochistic of employees! You are just waiting for the "Andy Barnard" moment. Someone is going to snap, and you know it. This is the culmination - the pinnacle of corporate underachievement, and like a storm brewing, you can feel it coming. You can taste it in the air and your can feel it on your skin. Someone is going to pop someone. This is going to be good.

One note though - the incident is never triggered by what you think (someone getting a bad review, or someone firing someone) it is always petty. Ed takes last of coffee and doesn't make any more. BAM!
Sally calls Louise a whore becuase she used a lot of lipstick. WHACK! You took my favorite parking spot in the otherwise empty parking lot. HYAAH.

This is the end, and the business can never be repaired, these incidents are the symbolic flames that burn up everything and leave nothing but ashes. It's over, and mercifully so. At this point even the worst employees leave, and even the doltish of management throw in the towel.


Requiem.

There you are. Cold in it's reality, stark in it's application. Nobody's fault - employees, management, investors, and suppliers all go down together on the SS Swirly, everybody is a loser. Save yourself. Your only hope is to recognize the signs and get out early.

I'd love to hear your stories to add to mine. Got any more signs of the apocalypse. Please share, for the good of all mankind

Airplane Travels - Flying the Friendly Skys

Given that my last diatribe garnered so many comments I thought that I might continue with some more "observations" on the subject. I hesitate somewhat, because the most derided subject in the world for most comedians is the subject of airline travel, so I beg pardon from my gentle readers, with an excuse on two fronts. Firstly, I am an observer of the human spirit and my observations take place over several decades and across many cultures. I'm not going to comment on the Boston to Vegas run. You've all done that and have your own observations. Secondly, I believe that I am somewhat of an authority on the subject having flown nearly one million miles in my business career alone. I've done a lot of other flying (falling with style?) but that is fodder for another mill at another time perhaps. In no order of importance I give you - Flying the Friendly skies.

• Mileage Clubs - how is it that if I accumulate miles, the airlines can tell me that they expire, that there are blackouts and that I can't travel with more than two people, and that I can't sit where I want to sit on the airplane? If I pay top dollar for a Omaha to Chicago run because I booked late, my 300 points is the same as the old lady next to me who paid 1/3 the price because she has the luxury of booking 6 months ahead of time? Then when I redeem, they pull all the blackout and choice seat crap on me?

• People, people, people - I know that you want to be comfortable when flying, but here are a few tips that might help you out as much as they will me. First - bathe. You know you want to do it. Next Orifice cleaning. Please don't do that on the airplane. Resist with all your might the urge to poke, insert, ream, wipe, grind, scratch, rub and lick the various orifices on your body. As a libertarian, I respect your right to do so, but please, not in front of the children. And here is a bonus tip - whatever you pull from said orifices, do not examine, wad up in your fingers and throw into the aisle. KC is serious on this one.

• In terms of clothing, I need to put this in reference terms. I was in Vegas recently. At an uber posh hotel. I was in a suit. A nice one. I was working. After observing the GUMS (Great Unwashed Masses) for awhile, I noted to a colleague that Vegas has lost some of it's charm after I observed a grandmother in a bikini dragging both her breasts and a cooler behind her through the casino, holding a lit cigarette in her mouth and a bottle of Bud in one hand. And she had tattoos. Lots of them. The segue to airline travel is this. You may think you are "all laid back" and "being a precious individual" and all, but I do not. In fact WE, do not. Cover yourself up, act your age and dress like you matter. Because if you don't, the rest of us see you as a visual eye-sore. Sorry to be harsh, but please, please, please, get a mirror.

• Kids on airlplanes. There, I said it. Think of an airplane as a torture chamber in Libya. Most of us don't want to be there, and are desperately trying to figure out how to escape or control our minds for the next three hours so that we don't crack. You child screaming "I want gum" or just plain screaming is akin to CIA water-boarding and is less pleasant. How does your spawn get through a day of school without riding the short bus if they can't sit in a chair and watch movies for 3 hours? If the child is screaming - it is your fault. I don't blame them, and pity you. I blame you, and pity me! Invest in duct tape or Dimetap, each works equally well.

• Drunk guy. I know the drinks are free in first class, and I know that you feel like you are sticking it to the man by getting as many as you can in three hours, and heck, I like my JD as well, but you don't hear me saying to the attendant "heavy on the vodka baby!" or randomly yelling "that's what I'm talking about" as you imbibe. And lastly, the little red stirring device in the cup is not a straw. For the love of god it is a stir stick. That's why it is so small you see. Please do not try and suck your martini through that little hole. It won't work, and you look stupid doing it. Sheesh.

Well, those are a few of my pet peeves. I could go on. Actually, I could go on and on and on. But I won't. You see, when travelling, discretion is often the better part of both valor and comfort.

For all of us.

Guitars, Cadillacs and Government Interference

So when the Obummer government wanted to crush the spirit of American business, ruin a key and historic industry for America and ensure hundreds if not thousands of Americans lose their jobs and become government dependees, they attacked Gibson guitars for their use of "endangered" wood - despite the fact that Gibson had complied with all laws in the US, and all laws overseas. Other guitar firms that weren't managed by prominent Republican CEOs, of course, were not targetted by the fleets of armed soldiers the government sent into Gibson to terrorize their workforce and purloin all of their working materials.


The government insists that business - even in matters of health care, cannot be trusted to do the right thing by their market, country and customers and must be forced, at the point of a gun if required, to comply with mandates that bureaucrats in Washington - yes the same ones that made all the GREAT decisions over at GSA, the ones we know we can trust with our money, have come up with.


But I digress.


But what if a business, a progressive, market attuned and smart business, interested in doing the right thing was to be left alone to solve a problem? According to the government office of Compliance and Thuggery, such businesses don't exist, and if they did, they surely would only be motivated by short term profits at the expense of their customers, their country and all natural resources? Is this true?

I give you Taylor Guitars.


Taylor recently acquired an ebony weood mill in Cameroon. Black ebony is a prized material for guitar fretboards. It's also on the verge of extinction.


Was this a hedge against diminishing worldwide supplies of ebony? Was it an effort to stabilize prices, or was the move was more about thoughtfully introducing sustainability into the supply chain? Surely no greedy business would THINK through the supply situation and get involved unless the government MADE them do it?

Perhaps not.


Alarmed by the diminishing supply of this wood, Taylor visited ebony loggers in Cameroon -- the last legal ebony harvesting site in the world. What they saw there defied business sense and common logic. Since the harvesters were unable to see whether an ebony tree would produce rich black wood, or an 'inferior' striated variety unless they first cut down the tree, they cut down 10 trees just to find the one "good one". And the nine trees that had been needlessly felled were left to rot.




Taylor realized that the striated ebony wood made acoustically and ergonomically perfect fretboards, amongst other guitar parts. In fact, Taylor had been using striated ebony for guitars since the company started -- initially as a cost-saving measure. Now, if other leading guitar brands could be convinced to use this wood, the ebony shortage would suddenly disappear, guitar builders would have ten times the supply and the Cameroons could sell 10 times as much wood.


Prior to the Cameroon acquistion, Taylor guitars had contemplated feedback from consumers recommending the company support tree replanting programs in areas stripped of ebony. It was a simple solution that would, in theory, provide a sustainable supply of the prized wood. It would also make for a wonderful corporate sustainability story.

In reality, however, the idea was less than ideal.

Bob Taylor said, "In places like Cameroon, it's not possible to do anything without a bribe. Planting trees in situations like this would simply fuel illegal harvesting, and do nothing to make the wood supply more sustainable." Taylor came to understand the solution was more complex. With the company's purchase of the mill, the full extent of that complexity was revealed.

"We quickly grasped there were fundamental issues that needed to be addressed -- contradictory laws and lumber accounting systems, for example" says Taylor. "We had to start by helping fix the system, demonstrating by example that doing business honestly -- taxing us and auditing us -- was in the government's best interest." Taylor is quick to point out that his company's approach has, of necessity, been methodical rather than splashy. "We aren't planting trees yet. We're working first to stop the illegal harvest, and get a better understanding of how many trees there actually are. Our focus is ensuring the harvest is legal, and then sustainable. It's a long-term strategy that might not make a great sound bite. But ultimately, it will help us save our own industry and the ebony species in Cameroon."

Taylor Guitars understands that looking at and understanding whole systems is key to creating successful, sustainable innovation, instead of "fake"solutions that make Western consumers feel good but do nothing to correct underlying problems. And this point is underscored when government bodies, with even less knowledge, with suspect motives and no accountability to anyone interfere with free market forces and , at the point of a gun, make companies behave the way they want them to.

It is bad business, bad poltics and bad ethics. While Taylor is succeeding because they were left alone, Gibson is still trying to get their ebony back from our government.

When will we learn?

Obama Demonstrating "Forward"

Obama demonstrates "Forward". What else can I say?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZGXZOrEV7_c&feature=plcp

Justice Department wants the facts. Their way.

So the justice department gets pissed off at Texas (the Great State Of) because Texas has the audacity (not of hope, but of reality) to seek to remove fraudulent, dead, illegal and duplicate voters from the voter rolls. You know, Democrats.

Anyhoo -

So the Justice Department hires (actually a no-bid contract, so anoints is closer to the truth) a data firm to ensure that the people being removed from the rolls are being purged fairly and accurately. As always, an Eric Holder justice department is the justice department of the people, and not the justice department of the Democratic party. Right. (okay - play along, I can't make this seem all dramatic if you keep reading ahead!)
Let's take a look at the unbiased, politically neutral, no axe to grind, independent, academic, scientific, pure, wholesome and honest folks over at "Catalist", the chosen firm of the Democr.... I mean justice department.


Client Listing:

Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee

Democratic Governors Association

Democratic Legislative Campaign Committee

Democratic Senatorial Campaign Committee

Democrats.com

Texas Democratic Trust

Vermont Democratic Party

Obama for America

Maine Democratic Party

Arizona Democratic Party

Surely that is just an error, and there is a Republican or two in there? Nope.


Surely that is just an error, and at least there is a conservative or two in there? Nope.
.

I'm sure their mission statement clarifies this whole big misunderstanding and outlines the depth to which they will pursue data excellence and impartiality?
.

To provide progressive organizations with the data and services needed to better identify, understand, and communicate with the people they need to persuade and mobilize.
.

Crap, struck out again. Well let's look at the owners, the founders of a great and noble business, retained by our justice department to provide, well, you know, justice.

Laura Quinn is a founder of Catalist, and has led the company since inception in 2006. Ms. Quinn has an extensive background in communications, technology and data innovation. She is a founding partner of QRS Newmedia, Inc. started in 1996, which specializes in communication technology design and integration services. QRS clients have included the DNC and every Democratic Presidential campaign from 1996 through 2008; a wide of range of progressive organizations and non-profits; and other corporate and academic institutions.

Patricia Bauman is President of the Bauman Foundation. In recent years, the Foundation has supported civic participation through general support of organizations engaged in voter registration and outreach and election protection. She has also led policy efforts to foster public access to government information. She is also a real estate investor, and is active as a donor to Democratic candidates.

Well, dang it, it seems like fairness can't get a fair shake around here can it? Justice may be blind, but she certainly knows when to take a peek from beneath her blindfold for Democrat causes doesn't she?

Random Rant About Nothing Political

After another 8 thousand miles in planes this week I've earned a chance to blow off some digitial steam. If some of my accusations hit a little too close to home for some of you - tough turds. Here's my random kvetching of the week. In no apparent order.

1. If you are sitting at a $20,000 boardroom table, FFS use a GD coaster for your double half caf skinny latte frappucino you prissy hillbilly. Sheesh.

2. If you are a flight attendant (sky waitress!) here's a tip. No amount of you screaming "WILL ALL PASSENGERS TAKE YOUR SEATS SO WE CAN LEAVE?" over the PA will actually help the 85 year old lady get her bag into an already full overhead. If you want people to move faster, help her out so I don't have to. Grrrr.


3. I don't care about your Facebook status, your pet's flatulence or the weird growth you noticed behind your ear. Jeezub Jumped up Joseph, can we please just chat about the weather? Or I'm going to do the deaf routine again.

4. If I catch one more of you rubes taking off your shoes and socks on the plane, I'm going to steal them and flush them down the freakin' toilet so you can walk out barefoot. I'm warnin' ya here - I mean business.

5. Please don't describe your role in your company using any of the following words: architect, guru, honcho, strategist, visionary or (and I swear this is true) Chief Experience Officer. If you do, I'm going to pass your business card out to every cop I meet and say you molested me. And your flatulent cat.

6. When sizing market opportunities - learn to add, and if you want to go to the head of the class, learn to muliply. For the love of all that is holy. I actually listened to someone say that moving from 3000 sales per year to 6000 sales per year is a 200% increase. Double - get it? And this was a consultant!

7. My name is simple. It has only 6 letters. There are only two known ways in the universe to spell it unless you include Klingon. I've worked with you for 5 freaking years, and between us we have done almost $50 million in business. Could you at least spell it right in the agenda as I am your largest customer? I'm not being vain, I'm just trying to eliminate your team sending me emails that never get to me because you insist on spelling my relatively simple name wrong.


8. If you feel the need to eat on the airplane - god bless - and chow down. But could you please refrain from bringing a whole pizza on and then asking me to hold it while you hone the edge of your spork in anticipation of slaughtering it? I bring a pill bottle of peanuts as a snack. That's it.



9. Seat guy. Reclining seat guy. I'm talking to you. I don't care that you recline your seat and encroach on the 5 inches of space I have, I wasn't using all that oxygen anyways. But as a personal favor to me, could you not recline your seat back at a speed that would test relativity? I mean if you are having a grand mal seizure I get it, but throwing your whole body backwards so hard that for a moment the plane slows down is a little much. It's like making love, slow and gentle usually gets the job done. Unless you are inseminating a boar. Sheesh.

I could go on (tip of the hat to Dennis Miller!) but I feel somewhat cleansed.

And to the nice lady today that invited me up to her home in Anchorage, that was super nice of you, and super cool. I just hope your cat gets better. Maybe feed him less salmon?

Monosodium Glutamate tastes good, and MSG is good for you!

There is no legitimate, proven, medically endorsed connection to the maladies that most of you are attributing to MSG. You concerns are relegated to the same realm as vampire hunting, Sasquatch and unicorns. Unless you can prove it, don't bring it up. If you don't want to prove it - just don't eat it. And shut up about it. Maybe I have the order wrong.

A study done by Dr. Nicholas Maragakis and Dr. Jeffrey Rothstein posted in the Journal of Neurology called “Glutamate Transporters in Neurologic Disease”, found no connection to claims of neurological damage or migraines from even large quantities of MSG.

Yet another study by Dr. Stevenson called “Monosodium glutamate and asthma” (J. Nutr. 130: 1067S-1073S) found no connection with MSG increasing or worsening asthma.

And most recently last year, an article in the medical journal Clinical & Experimental Allergy reported that after more than a decade of study, no connection between MSG and allergies were ever found.

Sheesh.

Ketchup is the food of the Gods.

I think I will write about Ketchup to take my mind off the economy. You can always trust Ketchup. Yes, ketchup is probably one of the most common ingredients on the kitchen tables in the US, in fact over 97% of homes have ketchup in them. Point of fact, despite what you have read, Americans consume FAR more ketchup than salsa. The confusion comes about because Americans SPEND more on salsa than Ketchup. Not hard to figure out when ketchup is 1/2 the price and has 4 times the shelf life of salsa.

Nowadays, most Americans think of ketchup as a tomato based product, but that wasn't always the case. Hundreds of years ago, the Chinese and Malaysians used the brine from pickled fish as dipping sauces. Known as kachiap, the sauce had a savory taste, flavored by the brine spices and fish. Europe in the 1600s, cooks began experimenting with different ingredients—besides anchovies, mushrooms, walnuts, oysters, and even lemons appeared in various ketchup recipes over the next couple of centuries. Throughout the ages, the only ingredient that remained constant was salt.

In the New World, tomatoes were known to be used in ketchup as early as the 1780s, though the first published recipe for tomato ketchup—created by James Mease, a physician and horticulturist from Philadelphia—dates only from about 1812.

It wasn't until the late 1800's when a Pennsylvania food producer took tomatoes, added vinegar, sugar, onion and some secret spices and bottled it did tomato ketchup take hold. Now, pretty much all ketchup in America is made the same way. Sure, the seasonings vary from brand brand, but to Americans, ketchup is a thick tomato based sauce.

Now when it comes to barbecue sauce and ketchup, well some would say that's a marriage made in heaven. Do a Google search for "ketchup and barbecue sauce" and you'll get 1,770,000 hits. Thanks to our friends at Kraft Foods, a thick tomato based sauce, aka Kansas City style, has become the definition of barbecue sauce in the US. Even in Texas, when they do use sauce, ketchup is often the first ingredient.

So, the next time you reach for a bottle of ketchup, remember, this year is the 200th anniversary of the birth of what we know as ketchup. And a tablespoon has only 16 calories - so enjoy!

Can Bank Robbers Vote?

The Democrats are up in arms because a state like Arizona dares to protect itself by enforcing the law, and surely their focus on state rights vs. federal responsibilities is in no way connected to getting more votes, but merely a theoretical, constitutional exercise
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An exercise that I am all for.                                                                                                                  

Since bank robbery is a federal crime, I am proposing that state police and local authorities do nothing to investigate, pursue or in any way assist in the management of bank robberies - instead, let's let the feds sort it out when they get around to it.It's not about the bank robber vote, it's about doing the right thing.

Do I have that right Mr. Schumer?

Course I do.

Who Wants to be in the Poorhouse!

Thats right ladies and gentlemen - Ketchup Chips is starting my own game show - Who Wants to Be in The Poorhouse!! In this fast paced game, contestants have to guess only one fact that corresponds to another fact - and the winner - and all his children and neighbors - are guaranteed a spot in the Poorhouse for the rest of their lives. It's educational, it's fun and it's downright exciting in a Russian Roulette kind of way. Are we ready to play? Of course you are!!!!!!!!!

Here's the first fact - the ten cities below have the largest percentage of their population living UNDER the poverty line in America:

1. Detroit , MI 32.5%

2 Buffalo , NY 29.9%
3. Cincinnati , OH 27.8%
4. Cleveland , OH 27.0%
5. Miami , FL 26.9%
6. St. Louis , MO 26.8%
7. El Paso , TX 26.4%
8. Milwaukee , WI 26.2%
9. Philadelphia , PA 25.1%
10. Newark , NJ 24.2%

And now - here is the question - for all the marbles - what is the one single fact that all of these diverse, geographically dispersed, multi-racial cities have in common? You can do it - c'mon, put that thinking cap on.

YOU GOT IT!!! Congratulations - the answer is they all have elected Democrat mayors and city councils for at least the last 30 or so years! You win a spot in the Poorhouse!!!!!!!!!!

Detroit, MI (1st on the poverty rate list) hasn't elected a Republican mayor since 1961.

Buffalo, NY (2nd) hasn't elected a Republican mayor since 1954.

Cincinnati, OH (3rd) hasn't elected a Republican mayor since 1984.

Cleveland, OH (4th) hasn't elected a Republican mayor since 1989.

Miami, FL (5th) has NEVER had a Republican mayor.

St. Louis, MO (6th) hasn't elected a Republican mayor since 1949.

El Paso, TX (7th) has NEVER had a Republican mayor.

Milwaukee, WI (8th) hasn't elected a Republican mayor since 1908.
 

Philadelphia, PA (9th) hasn't elected a Republican mayor since 1952.

Newark, NJ (10th) hasn't elected a Republican mayor since 1907.

So there you have it - the first round is complete, and we already have a winner that looks an awful lot like a loser. Tune in again next week when we tee up the next contestant on "Who Wants to Be in the Poorhouse!"

Welfare Fraud - how to maximize your benefits

Amanda Clayton hit the jackpot in the "Make Me Rich!" lottery show in October and, after electing to take a lump sum of $700,000 and allowing for taxes, was left with about $500,000.

The 24-year-old, who is unemployed, said she continued to receive public assistance. "I thought that they would cut me off, but since they didn't, I thought, maybe it was OK because I'm not working," Clayton said. "It's hard. I am struggling."

She added, "I feel that it's okay because I mean, I have no income and I have bills to pay. I have two houses."

But the Michigan Department of Human Services (DHS) said Wednesday that the woman was no longer receiving benefits and warned that people who continued to receive handouts in such circumstances may face criminal investigation and be required to pay back those benefits.

"Under DHS policy, a recipient of assistance benefits must notify the state within 10 days of any asset or income change. DHS relies on clients being forthcoming about their actual financial status," DHS director Maura Corrigan said.

"Michigan DHS does not currently have the ability to verify a person's lottery winnings in determining benefit eligibility, but bills pending in the state legislature would require the Michigan Lottery to notify the welfare department of winners.

"We fully support this proposed change. Our Office of Inspector General will continue to vigorously pursue any and all abuse and fraud in the welfare system."

+++++++++

You gotta love it! There are two points to take away from this:

 1. Welfare victims think they are entitled to support regardless of who has to pay for it, or how long they have to pay. The they we "owe" it to them, and can't see right from wrong.

 2. The "Inspector General" does no inspecting at all, and simply relies on the "good intentions" of the welfare victims to pay back the money they stole, or to notify (fat freaking chance) the department if they are getting money not due them. The office should be renamed Non-Inspecting Inspector General. 

I was somewhat sympathetic to the pleas of some unemployment victims who may be forced to get drug testing prior to receiving benefits, but I think that sympathy has gone out the window - courtesty of one Amanda Clayton.

These victims, for the most part, are stealing from the rest of us, or making us pay for their poor life choices (a la Ms. Fluke!).

Have you feed your welfare victim today? Lord knows I have. And they are eating steak.

Obama's 2012 Loss - the Math behind the defeat...

If you begin to look at the chance of Obama losing in 2012, the electoral math is daunting.


Let's begin with the 2008 results adjusted for the post-Census re-districting. I think even the most rabid of left leaners would agree that this is a baseline and that the chances that Obama will win MORE electoral votes than he did three years ago is zero.  No results, bad job, bad economy with anemic recovery that nobody feels is a recovery. Millions still unemployed, union friends compensated for Solyndra, GM and over 2100 health care "exemptions".


Then we'll begin with what I think are fairly obvious adjustments -- we'll give the Republicans back the electoral votes they lost in Nebraska along with Indiana, North Carolina, and Virginia -- traditionally Republican states that Obama carried last time through a special magic the like of which we are not likely to see again. Not the usual Chicago dead people voting magic, magic none the less.


Let's work from that base of 219 electoral votes and assume that the following states are potential battlegrounds in 2012: Washington, Oregon, Nevada, Colorado, New Mexico, Minnesota, Iowa, Wisconsin, Michigan, Ohio, Pennsylvania, New Hampshire, and Florida. We'll throw in Maine and New Jersey as stretch states as well just to be conservative. Sorry for the pun.


This gives the Republican nominee an almost unlimited number of paths to the White House.


Perhaps the most obvious one, in that it resembles the 2000 and 2004 battlegrounds most heavily, is that a Republican could win by just by taking just Florida, Ohio, and Nevada from that list of states.


Or,  the Repubicans could just tie it -- and win in a Republican-controlled House -- simply by taking Ohio, Michigan, and Wisconsin from the rust belt and only Nevada in the West.


Alternatively, they could win without taking a single rust-belt state by winning in Nevada, New Mexico, Colorado, Florida, and New Hampshire. This outcome seems like a real possibility given Florida's now rabid distate for President Zero, and Nevada's growing dislike of Senator Reid.


Another odd-looking way of doing it would be to take Pennsylvania, Ohio, Nevada, and Oregon, although Ohio looks a little floppy given their propensity of voting for candidates with the most handouts.


In any event, working from this base, Obama has to take 2/3 of the electoral votes in battleground states this time around to get the job done.


And there is not enough Acorn left to plant a tree that big.

Is your Smart Meter Spying on You?

Most of us by now have one these devices on our house - the new-fangled meter that allows the power company to take a reading of our power consumption remotely without having to send a service representative around the neighborhood the write it all down. Innocent as can be right?

Potentially not.

The meter can tell when you use power, what applicances are drawing loads, and by extention, when you are home, what rooms you use the most, what temperature you keep your house at, how many people live there, and on and on. Your TIVO already tracks every show you watch, every commercial you skip or watch - and even every slice of tv you rewind (thank you Janet Jackson). Doesn't feel so innocent any more does it?

Who else would want your data than just ther power company?

Neighborhood “busy bodies” will want to know what their neighbors are doing for the sheer pleasure of knowing, or the greater pleasure of gossiping.

Vengeful ex-spouses, jealous paramours, determined stalkers, and civil litigants may want to know an individual’s whereabouts and activities.

Burglars could use intercepted data to determine when a location is unoccupied, what an occupant is doing,and whether valuable electronics are inside.

A thief gaining access to bi-directional communications or controls could activate or deactivate intrusion alarms to divert police from, or to facilitate unlawful access to, a target.

Vandals could manipulate environmental controls, fire suppression systems, etc., to damage property as an end in itself.

Lastly, market manipulators, extortionists, terrorists, and others with political agendas could use unauthorized access to AMI command and control systems to disrupt the delivery of services to targeted facilities, create widespread blackouts, disrupt load balancing commands, or create fear and panic among the general population.

Insurance companies could petition for the data to reject a claim based on activities within the house. Most policies require you to have someone attend the home at least once in 24 hours. If you are on vacation and Aunt Edna forgets to come by, and the house burns down - the insurance company could deny your claim.

Follow the money

Corporations, utilities, vendors, and third party data brokers will want to position themselves to sell meter data or analytics, just as credit reporting agencies have done. If utilities want to capture this revenue, and/or to prevent others from capturing it, they will need carefully crafted contractual provisions that clearly define who owns the AMI data and what rights the consumer, utility, service provider, or other third parties have to use or transfer it.

Surely the constitution protects me?

Law enforcement will also want on-demand access to your data. In the U.S., law enforcement presently has limited access to meter data to establish ownership of a place involved in criminal activities or to obtain search warrants for facilities suspected of drug production.Otherwise, the prohibition of unreasonable searches and seizures in the Fourth Amendment of the U.S. Constitution limits access to this data without first obtaining a warrant from a judge.

However, because these protections generally do not apply to information revealed to third parties, a California Court of Appeals held that data collected from a specially installed surveillance electricity meter could be obtained by law enforcement without a warrant. Because the metering equipment was outside and did not reveal information about activities within the home, the Court found no constitutional protection.

Sophisticated analysis of metering data might reveal enough about in-home behavior to reverse this outcome. On the other hand, as the use of such technologies becomes more common, consumer expectations may change, thereby placing law enforcement use of meter data outside of Fourth Amendment protections. As a result, data revealed to a utility, billing agency, or other vendor may now be available to law enforcement without a warrant. Utilities and others handling meter data will need to understand what they may, or must, do when law enforcement agencies demand access.

So what am I going to do about it?

Each utility has to be responsible for the data. Each one will provide you with a privacy policy (which you probably round file). Read it - and speak up. If you don't like their privacy rules, they generally have a public overview board that you can squawk to. Lastly - ensure that when you are talking to them ask them to confirm that they are using a breach solution from a professional breach reporting / solution company. You want to be notified when they invetibably and/or accidently expose your data to the world.

And close the fridge and stop watching Mexican wrestling on TeleMundo. Big Brother is watching you....

http://goldsilver.com/video/smart-meters/

Liberal Bias in the Media The Victory Continues!

A New Jersey teachers union chief whose salary tops $300,000 is under fire for saying in a recent interview that "life's not always fair" while arguing against vouchers to send poor students to private schools.

New Jersey Education Association Executive Director Vincent Giordano made the comment on the local "New Jersey Capitol Report" program over the weekend. During the interview, he was challenged by the host on why low-income families should not have the same options as other families when their child is in a failing school.

 

"Those parents should have exactly the same options and they do. We don't say that you can't take your kid out of the public school. We would argue not and we would say 'let's work more closely and more harmoniously,'" Giordano said.

When told some families cannot afford to finance the shift to private school without government help, Giordano said: "Well, you know, life's not always fair and I'm sorry about that."

This was reported in a blog. Romney's comment that he doesn't worry about the poor because there is a safety net for them in this country - front page news for weeks.

Don't buy it people. Don't buy what they are selling....

Great Indian Rock Singers

Gobi West

Bindi Lauper

Papadam and the Ants

Siouxsie and the Bhajees

Raita Coolidge

Raita Said Fred

Tikka That

Jalfraizee goes to Bollywood

Emerson Lake and Pilau

Pat Bhunatar

Chapati Labelle

Sisters of Methi

Aloo Rolls

Ketchup Chips Pops Blogger Balloons

This lady said her blogs were about dance, movies and she liked sex....

T

 This lady said she was into Horses, Fashion and Food. I combined them for her.......

 This guy said he had a phobia about insect bites. I think he may be a little freaked after my reply:

 This lady writes a blog about interior decor and admonished us plebes to be more adventurous with color selection. I'm hoping this note served to shut her up.....

This guy insisted he was the Edison of India and could invent anything. Let's see him try and top this!

New Indian Super Car - the Avanti

At the New Delhi Auto Expo this week, Pune-based automotive and interior design firm DC Design unveiled India’s first homegrown supercar, the Avanti.

Perhaps a testament to India’s notoriously crowded and poorly maintained roads, the $56,000 two-seater aims for relatively modest performance from its 240 hp 2.0-liter turbocharged four-cylinder engine built  by Ford. Nevertheless, the company claims it will reach a limited top speed of 155 mph. Built on a space-frame chassis, the mid-engine Avanti is about the size of a Chevrolet Corvette, and comes with a six-speed manual transmission. DC hopes to sell 300-400 units in its first year and exports are being considered.

DC Design describes the car as “a stunner in more ways than one and a smile inducer and big name basher made in India.”

As Paul Harvey said "And now, the rest of the story!"

In proving ground tests, the prototype of the Avanti was involved in a collision with a street vendor's tiffin supply cart, seriously damaging the vehicle and spreading chicken vindaloo across the test site.The test pilot for some of the first test runs of the new vehicle was the world renowned driver and great Indian rally pilot Sriminamnasimsimaramalama Shrinigarpunedelhibomanwalla, who got the car up to a top speed of 100 goats before the unfortunate collision occured.

SS was quoted as saying "by the many arms of Vishnu, I swear that my driving was not to blame for the mash-up".

The repaired Avanti will be appearing in the  new Bollywood film "Women with Mustaches, Men with Red Coats" as the vehicle of choice for the Indian James Bond, the fictional Super Spy
J.P Pandaramandurumbollywallabimbimettiboingboing, replacing the Tata Nano previously used by the dashing international man of mystery as he chased skirts and the 6th level of Dharmic conciousness across the globe.

DC Design also announced that plans are underway for a light truck version of the model, with the potential market name of "Distributed Load Vehicle" and that marketing tie-ins with India's largest fast food chain "Intestines on a Stick" were nearly concluded.

When asked for about production costs for the new Avanti, a DC design spokesperson declined to release the proprietary information, but indicated that they have reduced labor costs to a point whereby the salary inputs into the vehicle were "less than what it would take to feed a family of 4. 4 mice that is!"

Hybrids have worse fuel economy than many other cars on the road

A Honda customer is taking the road less traveled to sue the Japanese auto maker for allegedly making false mileage claims about her 2006 Civic Hybrid.

Heather Peters is set to appear in court Jan. 3rd,  2012 in Torrance, Calif., the home of American Honda Motor, to argue that her vehicle never delivered the 50 mpg touted by the auto maker in a sales brochure.

Peters said that her car never delivered "more than 41 or 42 mpg on its very best day," adding that the mileage normally came in around the high 30s.

All of this for a car with a $7,000 premium in its price tag and a $7,500 greenie weenie rebate paid for by you and I the taxpayer. Total cost of this vehicle today without rebate?

$26,000.

A bit pricey for a weed- whacker you say? The contention of the green goblins was that you would "make up the difference" in the overpriced, over-subsidized, uncomfortable, unsafe vehicles by recouping money on fuel. Of course - the economics of that fall apart when fuel is less than $3.50 per gallon.

Let's read some more of what Ms. Peters has to say about her hybrid. She said she became really "ticked off" last year when Honda performed a software update to prevent vehicle batteries from deteriorating too quickly. The car's mileage suffered as a result of the battery fix, Peters said, dropping to the high 20s per gallon, which eventually forced her to take legal matters into her own hands.

Peters, a former corporate defense attorney, is urging other disgruntled Honda customers to opt out of a class action lawsuit over the mileage claims, and seek a larger payout in small claims court.

She launched a website "Don'tSettleWithHonda.org" with the intention of taking her legal fight viral.

Peters said claimants could be awarded up to $10,000 in small claims court, as opposed to the $200 in cash and a rebate of $500 to $1,000 toward a new Honda vehicle that will be awarded in the class action settlement.

"Class actions are great for little cases, but not for cases like this where Honda's false advertising is costing already cash-strapped families more every day at the gas pump," Peters said.

Peters estimates that if other customers follow her lead, the automaker could be forced to pay $2 billion for its questionable fuel-efficiency claims - all of which were backed, endorsed and certified by (wait for it!) - the government agency responsible for all false claims of greenness - the EPA!

So let's take the high road and give the Hybrid Civic a 34 MPG COMBINED city/highway rate since she mentions both high 20's and low 30's - we'll split the difference. We'll analyze what the difference is between a wind-up mobile and a real car if you are thinking with your head, and not with your tiny greenie weenie. Surely no non-hybrid car could approach the EPA ratings of these expensive, uncomfortable, poor performing and dangerous little cars? Let's take a look:

Jetta TDI Diesel

• Diesel engines get better mpg generally speaking, but they are still a tough sell in North America. The 1970s brought several underpowered, smelly, smoke-belching diesels to American shores, and the buying public hasn't forgotten them. It's too bad, because clean diesel technology powers the sleek Jetta to a muscular 41 mpg on the highway with a very respectable 34 mpg for combined highway and city driving.

Wow - the Jetta is at least as good as the pie-brid.

Mini Cooper

• The Cooper delivers good fuel efficiency, along with a cool factor, though the luster has worn off a bit since its release. Very good highway numbers (37 mpg) bring the Mini's combined mpg to a robust 32.

Wow - I can look cool, and get the same mileage as the pie-brid?

Chevy Cobalt

• A surprise for Americans is that they have such a versatile gas-sipper in their own backyard. The Cobalt uses a large overdrive gear and direct injection to achieve 37 mpg on the highway, which more than offsets its middling 25 in the city for a great 32 mpg average.

            American made? And still as efficient as a hybrid? For $10,000 less????

Ford Focus

• Another American-born entry quietly delivers solid numbers by virtue of its gaudy 34 on the highway. The low city number of 24 prevents this from being a standout pick, but 29 mpg combined makes it worth consideration.

Wow - 10% more gas than the hybrid - over the course of a year it will cost me an extra $100 bucks or so to have a cool car with comfort and power - not to mention the $10,000 savings?

Nissan Versa

• There's not a "2" in sight on this miser's stat sheet. A superior 30 in the city (that's just three less than the tiny Dumb for Fortwo) yields a combined 32 mpg. City dwellers often suffer in the mpg category, but the Versa spreads the wealth for outstanding surface street driving and an adequate highway number of 34 mpg.

Larger trunk space, better handling, no batteries, seats 4 comfortably, priced some $15,000 cheaper than the hybrid Civic and has BETTER mileage? Given this range of choices, calling your vehicle a "Smart Car" can't make up for the fact you are a dumb consumer. Hang your heads in shame.

Next on Ketchup Chips - the Great Battery Bailout, or when the value of used hybrids falls to zero in the next two years.