The Obama Family Problem

Okay Michelle, this conversation isn't going to be easy, but I think it is time that we put a little fiscal responsibility into the Obama household. After getting denied that car loan because of our credit situation - we have got to do something. So here are the numbers.


Last year as a family we made $108,500. Pretty good - all of those community organizing events that I put on are starting to pay off. But here's where it gets scary Michelle - together, the 4 of us SPENT $191,100 for the year.


Holy crap. I mean really? Holy crap! That amount of $82,600 we overspent put our total debit at $713,550 for a family. Holy crap, that's all I can say.


Now, I know that you are a good housekeeper and all, and the coupon clipping has really helped out but that total was only $1,925. I mean, it isn't a drop in the bucket.


Now, I can try and get more Black Panthers to intimidate voters and all - heck I might even ask my rich uncle to donate some money for an advance on the new book I'm writing. But heckfire Michelle, we have got to get the spending under control around here, or we're going to be in big trouble. Dang it  -  we ARE in big trouble. Earning 15 or 20% more by taking money from my rich relatives isn't going to make a lot of difference.


And no, Michelle just stopping the "discretionary spending" isn't going to help. That's pocket change. I mean it's good and all, but that isn't going to get this under control.


We've got to get to the meat of this and cut off the things that we signed up for that we have to pay every month - I mean, less giving to our poor neighbors who won't work, no more paying for your niece's 5th baby, and stopping sending money to that guy in Idaho so he won't make any more Obama Chia-pets. We just don't have the money for it any more, and giving all these hangers on a "hand up" has turned into a "hand out". Enough is enough Michelle - we're cutting all these losers off right now.


Okay, okay, stop the crying - it isn't all your fault. We both spent our way into this, and there is no spending our way out of it. Your lazy relatives will be motivated to find work once we stop giving them handouts, and my rich uncle says he has enough money to start a new business or two if we stop taking from him, so everyone will get taken care of.


Michelle - sometimes a real man has got to do what a real man has got to do. It may be tough now, but it's the best for all our futures.


Whats that?


No, you can't give your brother money so that he will like you again. Are you even listening to me?


Fercrisakes!