Wednesday, May 2, 2012

New Jersey woman suntans until she is a corpse!

This is hard to believe, but a New Jersey woman is accused of taking her 5 year old daughter to a tanning salon when state regulations prohibit anyone under 14 from being roasted alive, Snooki style.

Patricia Krentcil (no relation to mummifed Egyptian King Amenhotep I) says that her daugher was never in the booth, but blames the little girl's sunburn on a "contact high" from her own smouldering carcass.

Let this be a warning to those of you with ovaries - you have a responsibility to use them in an appropriate manner. Use the "Goldfish" test to see if you are "parent ready". If you cannot be trusted with the care of a goldfish, do not reject Darwinian theory and procreate.

4 comments:

  1. Saw this on the news yesterday! What an idiot! Looks like she fell in a vat of grapes or something. And i agree with you---lots of bad mothers out there who wouldn't have a clue how to take care of goldfish or a hamster, let alone a child. Tie the tubes, baby!
    Hop over to my latest post--I miss your witty sarcasm on my comment section!

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  2. This twit reminded me of one of those bizoingos you see on "Hoarders"! The ones that say "what jars of urine? I don't see any jars of urine?"

    I remember seeing one of those super obese people on TV who went from 800 lbs to 200 lbs. The reporter asked them what triggered them to lose the weight, and the guy says "one day I looked in the mirror, and there I was - 800 lbs, and I knew I had to change."

    What the heck does that mean? At 550lbs you look in the mirror and say "heeyyyyy ladies, check it out!"? It just underscores the power of the human mind to control you if you don't control it. Super weird. Poor little kid.

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  3. When my friends and I first saw this lady on the news, we laughed our asses off. She literally tanned herself black and I'm sure that that is not healthy. It's really weird because she's darker than I am and I'm black.

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  4. I never thought of that angle before! Maybe she is going to create her own church and compete with Jesse Jackson and Sharpton. I can see it now "I'm being oppressed for the color of my skin! The man is keepin' me down!" (grin)

    Just goes to show you it IS the content of your character that makes all the difference....

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